If I were a beginning, I would be:- the beginning of a new friendship
If I were a month, I would be: -December
If I were a day of the week, I would be :– Thursday
If I were a time of day, I would be: - Sunset
If I were a planet, I would be:-Saturn
If I were a season, I would be:- Monsoons
If I were a sea animal, I would be:-Dolphin
If I were a direction, I would be:-South
If I were a piece of furniture, I would be:-An old Rocking Chair
If I were a sin, I would be:-Lust
If I were a liquid, I would be:-the first drop of tear
If I were a fraud/scare, I would be:-"Peter the Cheater"
If I were a gem, I would be:-Emerald
If I were a tree, I would be:-Neem
If I were a tool, I would be –Chisel
If I were a flower/plant, I would be:- A White Rose
If I were a kind of weather, I would be:-A thunderstorm
If I were a musical instrument, I would be:-a Violin
If I were an animal, I would be:- Cat
If I were an emotion, I would be:-Passion
If I were a vegetable, I would be:-Cucumber
If I were a sound, I would be:-the distant strains of a flute
I were an element, I would be:-Fire
If I were a car, I would be:-auto rickshaw
If I were a song, I would be:-I Drove All Night
If I were a food, I would be:-A Chapatti
If I were a place, I would be:-Austria
If I were a material, I would be:-Cotton
If I were a taste, I would be:-the taste of soil in your mouth after a fall
If I were a scent, I would be:-the scent of a new born.
If I were a religion, I would be:-Courage
If I were a sentence, I would be:-I Love You
If I were a body part, I would be:-Eyelash
If I were a facial expression, I would be:-the right eyebrow lift
If I were a subject in college, I would be:-English History
If I were a shape, I would be:-Square
If I were a quantity, I would be:-a Lifetime
If I were a colour, I would be:-Red
If I were a thing, I would be:-a Photograph
If I were a landmass, I would be:-an island in the middle of the pacific
If I were a book, I would be:-"The Color Purple"
If I were a monument, I would be:-T
If I were an artist, I would be:-colouring the town red
If I were a collection of poems, I would be:-"collected poetry:Sylvia Plath"
If I were a landscape, I would be:-the Grand Canyon
If I were a watch, I would be.- A Sleek Metal Banded one
If I were God, I would be:-Amused
If I were a vowel, I would be: U
If I were a consonant, I would be: Z
If I were a formula, I would be:-(A+B)^2=A^2+B^2+2AB
If I were a Science, I would be:-Geology
If I were a theory, I would be:-The theory of fluid mechanics
If I were a famous person, I would be.:-A violinist.
If I were an electronic equipment, I would be:-an alarm clock
If I were sport, I would be:-Martial Arts
If I were a movie, I would be:-The Pianist
If I were a cartoon, I would be:-Jughead Jones
If I were an explorer, I would be:-Amerigo Vespucci
If I were a scientist, I would be:-Schizophrenic
If I were a relation, I would be:-a Wife
If I were a river, I would be:-Nile
If I were intoxication, I would be:-Ecstasy
If I were alone, I would be:-Sleeping
If I were a question, then I would be:-Really?
If I were a hobby, I would be:-Singing
If I were a habit, I would be:- Washing Your own Dish
If I were in an atom, I would be:-a Electron
If I were an end, I would be:-the end of an Unnecessary Relation
If I were you, I would be:-Smothered by Me
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Exam FFever
yes,its examination time once again...
my half-yearlys (i hope i got the spelling right!) are starting tomorrow (bang on with the colourful subject called 'chemistry')...and here i am pouring down my take on 'examz' and the hype surrounding it.....
in class thoughout the term, i am almost the unofficial joker; I hop from ankita's(ankit as i call her) desk to fogla's desk discussing the latest bestseller,movie, how silly a certain someone is ; or just randomly picking up a chat with the teacher in charge....or whoever shows the slightest inclination to blabber or simply listen to me blabbering.
As long as the teacher's teaching i give 99.8% attention(c'mon even '''science''' students have their limits!) ,but no sooner does the teacher disappear from the classroom that i jump out from my chair ,ready with new stories and PJs.
The scene 2 weeks before the exam:
pallavi: anchal,have u started studing??i am gonna flunk...u kno i havent even finished my chemical bonding
i say: no yaar...u wont
she:i swear i will..
me:no u wont...i will
she:no u wont.........
and it goes on ....its the favourite timepass conversation actually..
what i am actually thinking :* is chemical bonding there in the syllabus ?i never knew...wow! *
the scene 1 week before the black day:
anu: shit,i am getting tensed yaar...,shit bludy shit...shit ...shit
madhurima(pouring over the permutation sums): how do u do these.
i say(all confident): well ....errr.....dont worry...people have been taking science 2nd terminals long before we we learnt how to change our undies.
i think:*hmmm...studies...a rite....ya...ohk...exams are coming up...i shud be studying right?*
i get the biggest shock when i see Rhea,and Maha(sweta) doing accounts ...concentrating..! whoever said commerce students dont stud....and science students are nerds must have been a .....grrr(bunk.)
one day before the exam:
i start getting all jittery(i was the one who was consoling others just hours back) and there is a funny feeling deep in my belly...
"this too will pass..,like it always does.....chill down",i tell myself...
the days of exams are usually spent sleeping, eating, roaming around the house like a zombie,chatting with mummy(u feel less guilty chatting than u do watching TV),listening to shitty songs, and flicking through pages of the book....
thinking what u will do after the exams(although i have stopped thinking about this one...its just not worth it)
and finally the monster exits...leaving ou exhausted ,but happy....
pujas.diwali.christmas.new year.
then the countdown to the finals begin and the same story follows ...
"i'm gonna flunk"
"no you wont"
"i say i am"
"no..."
my half-yearlys (i hope i got the spelling right!) are starting tomorrow (bang on with the colourful subject called 'chemistry')...and here i am pouring down my take on 'examz' and the hype surrounding it.....
in class thoughout the term, i am almost the unofficial joker; I hop from ankita's(ankit as i call her) desk to fogla's desk discussing the latest bestseller,movie, how silly a certain someone is ; or just randomly picking up a chat with the teacher in charge....or whoever shows the slightest inclination to blabber or simply listen to me blabbering.
As long as the teacher's teaching i give 99.8% attention(c'mon even '''science''' students have their limits!) ,but no sooner does the teacher disappear from the classroom that i jump out from my chair ,ready with new stories and PJs.
The scene 2 weeks before the exam:
pallavi: anchal,have u started studing??i am gonna flunk...u kno i havent even finished my chemical bonding
i say: no yaar...u wont
she:i swear i will..
me:no u wont...i will
she:no u wont.........
and it goes on ....its the favourite timepass conversation actually..
what i am actually thinking :* is chemical bonding there in the syllabus ?i never knew...wow! *
the scene 1 week before the black day:
anu: shit,i am getting tensed yaar...,shit bludy shit...shit ...shit
madhurima(pouring over the permutation sums): how do u do these.
i say(all confident): well ....errr.....dont worry...people have been taking science 2nd terminals long before we we learnt how to change our undies.
i think:*hmmm...studies...a rite....ya...ohk...exams are coming up...i shud be studying right?*
i get the biggest shock when i see Rhea,and Maha(sweta) doing accounts ...concentrating..! whoever said commerce students dont stud....and science students are nerds must have been a .....grrr(bunk.)
one day before the exam:
i start getting all jittery(i was the one who was consoling others just hours back) and there is a funny feeling deep in my belly...
"this too will pass..,like it always does.....chill down",i tell myself...
the days of exams are usually spent sleeping, eating, roaming around the house like a zombie,chatting with mummy(u feel less guilty chatting than u do watching TV),listening to shitty songs, and flicking through pages of the book....
thinking what u will do after the exams(although i have stopped thinking about this one...its just not worth it)
and finally the monster exits...leaving ou exhausted ,but happy....
pujas.diwali.christmas.new year.
then the countdown to the finals begin and the same story follows ...
"i'm gonna flunk"
"no you wont"
"i say i am"
"no..."
Monday, September 17, 2007
10 easy points
Since it is very fashionable to make lists,i tried to make a list of ten ways in which you can improve the quality of your life:
1. it is essential to spend some time alone with yourself everday. not all of us can meditate successfully,but we can,at least, collect our thoghts together. sometimes it helps to write your thoughts down; you can feel the weight visibly lifting from our mind(and indeed you heart).
2. In times of stress, imagine the worst outcome of whatever it is that is worrying you. you will,then,suddenly realize that it isn't worth the worry. Sometimes , you can conjure up a mental picture of actually digging a hole in the ground and burying your worry. It may , perhaps,fade from your mind.
3. Do something new and challenging each day( like speaking to someone you don't usually speak to).Sometimes, it is important to get out of your comfort zone.
4. Make learning a continuous process- pick up a newspaper,read a book or browse the internet. Learning something new daily will make you a better conversationalist and enhance your creativity.
5. Combine mechanical physical work with an activity you enjoy. Listen to music will travelling/cleaning your room,/waiting for an appointment. If ou enjoy talking to someone,do so when you feel like it.catch up with old friends at regular intervals.....attend the reunions ,little get-togethers.
6. Go outside and look at the night sky. you will realize how vast the universe is ,and that you are only a speck in it. it will create in you a natural sense of humility and also a sense of timelessness about the continuity of you life.
7. find out what makes you happy. rate your overall satisfaction with each activity on a scale 1-10. that will help you to understand which one adds more meaning to your life. tr to include more of those everyday.
8. when you remember something ,do it at once.posponement can mean oblivion; or mark against the date on the calender, the nearest when you can do it.
9. Actively express appreciation. Smile a lot, give lots of warm hugs. Sometimes a simulation of happinass can actually generate joy.
10. Forgive little hurts. It is up to you whether you wish to take offence. we do not,after all, receive it.
relax and things will fall into place.
warning: not to be put to actual practice....only to be enjoyed in print!!
1. it is essential to spend some time alone with yourself everday. not all of us can meditate successfully,but we can,at least, collect our thoghts together. sometimes it helps to write your thoughts down; you can feel the weight visibly lifting from our mind(and indeed you heart).
2. In times of stress, imagine the worst outcome of whatever it is that is worrying you. you will,then,suddenly realize that it isn't worth the worry. Sometimes , you can conjure up a mental picture of actually digging a hole in the ground and burying your worry. It may , perhaps,fade from your mind.
3. Do something new and challenging each day( like speaking to someone you don't usually speak to).Sometimes, it is important to get out of your comfort zone.
4. Make learning a continuous process- pick up a newspaper,read a book or browse the internet. Learning something new daily will make you a better conversationalist and enhance your creativity.
5. Combine mechanical physical work with an activity you enjoy. Listen to music will travelling/cleaning your room,/waiting for an appointment. If ou enjoy talking to someone,do so when you feel like it.catch up with old friends at regular intervals.....attend the reunions ,little get-togethers.
6. Go outside and look at the night sky. you will realize how vast the universe is ,and that you are only a speck in it. it will create in you a natural sense of humility and also a sense of timelessness about the continuity of you life.
7. find out what makes you happy. rate your overall satisfaction with each activity on a scale 1-10. that will help you to understand which one adds more meaning to your life. tr to include more of those everyday.
8. when you remember something ,do it at once.posponement can mean oblivion; or mark against the date on the calender, the nearest when you can do it.
9. Actively express appreciation. Smile a lot, give lots of warm hugs. Sometimes a simulation of happinass can actually generate joy.
10. Forgive little hurts. It is up to you whether you wish to take offence. we do not,after all, receive it.
relax and things will fall into place.
warning: not to be put to actual practice....only to be enjoyed in print!!
Monday, July 30, 2007
Shonty's Day Out (short story)
Another day had begun. It was only ten in the human clock, but all the permanent residents of Mangalore Zoo were already exhausted because of the unbearable summer’s heat. Shonty, the monkey was feeling very hot.
“Whew….hmph…”, he said to himself, wiping the stream of sweat streaming down his brow.
Some ill-mannered human children were throwing banana peels at him through the bars. But these things weren’t bothering him today. What he really wanted was something soft and creamy and delicious, something that would sooth his burning throat….the funny looking thing that humans called ‘ice-cream’…
Last summer, a naughty boy had thrown his half eaten ice-cream at him…he had reluctantly tasted it because he had nothing better to do…and voila, he instantly fell in love with the funny taste. He had been craving for more ever since.
But the caretaker of the monkeys, a young lad named Chandu was at his wit’s end trying to understand what Shonty was asking for. For ten whole minute, he jumped in front of Chandu, violently rubbing his chest and licking his hands like a dog. Chandu thought he was probably suffering from over-exhaustation and offered him nuts…eew…if there was one thing he hated, it had to be nuts.
Shonty’s new room-mate, Riggo was swinging on the branches, entertaining the crowds. Riggo seemed to be enjoying the attention.
“Silly fellow”, thought Shonty, ”in a few days, he will also get bored of this stardom”.
Shonty had stayed in the bars long enough to know the pro and cons of zoo life. Yes, food, shelter, security etc. were provided….but the basic need…’freedom’ was taken away. Most animals had become sick of being the centre of attraction all the time. Everyone expected maximum entertainment from them at all hours of the day. Shonty did not bother to entertain the visitors……..after all, he would get his meals anyways, regardless of whether he performed his tricks or not.
Riggo had come just a month back; he used to be in the circus earlier. He still hadn’t got used to the new environment. Poor chap.
The Mangalore zoo had been Shonty’s home for as long as he could remember. His mother, Chakki, had died within few months of his birth. He had understood the mortality of animals at a very young age and this realization had made him very stern and indifferent towards others. Concepts of love, passion and friendship were meaningless to him. So even when all the other male monkeys drooled over the pretty and charming female monkey, Hoomie, who lived in the opposite cage, Shonty was satisfied with his daily meals and male companionship. Shonty was a confirmed bachelor.
Today, he felt like breaking the strong iron bars and running away to some place which would be cooler. Summers were the only time of the year when he pitied himself.
And what luck! Chandu the caretaker had accidentally left the beck door open as he rushed out quickly to bathe the elephants. Shonty saw the perfect opportunity. He slowly sneaked out of the door, making sure that none of the monkeys realized. He saw a boy eating orange ice-cream. He took giant leaps and reached the boy, then suddenly descended on him and snatched the ice-cream. The little boy let out a shriek full of terror.
“What is there to be scared of now?” thought Shonty,”just a few minutes ago you were teasing me though the cage…”.Humans are the funniest animals, he decided.
Shonty finished the ice-cream in seconds, and then continued his quest for more. He had one ice-cream after another….until his belly resembled a miniature pot. Only then was he content. He quietly sneaked back into the cage. This zoo was his only home…he could not even think of living elsewhere.
Later in the evening, Chandu came again to clean the cages. Realizing his mistakes of leaving the door open, he shot a nervous glance at the monkeys…
“One, two, three…..five……phew…..all are there……god saved me today”, he counted aloud. “Extra nuts for you all”, he declared. He patted Shonty and whispered softly, “Good boy.”
that period....between 2a.m & 4a.m
its that time of the night when my brain is at its active best....
although i dint exactly know wat to wite....my fingers seem to have acquired a life of their own and just dancing away to glory (as if to meet their long lost lover)..
i know not wat i am blabbering about;but tis enough that i am their and can feel the air going into my lungs as i breathe, and then following the same journey out ....but lacking one of its components(oxygen) which has somehow decided to stay back and help out my cells to burn mass in exchange of energy...E=mc2......i shall remember Mr. Newton>>>
they sound of the fan rotating( as if crying out for freedom) never seemed so prominent..
vague thoughts just enter my brain and leave before registering my memory...
very soon the birds will begin to chirp again (who the bloody hell tells them the time??)..
and slowly as if out of eternity,the yellow ball of plasma will rise into the sky...WONDERFUL...AWESOMEE (here awesome means a phenomenon which generates 'awe',not to be confused with the manner that we use at the drop of the hat for everything...from the chicken kebeb...to JLo's ass!)
why do we have to kno all the answers .....why did we have to know that the earth is revolving around the sun and not the other way round and exactly how life is created inside the womb????
why cant we let the mysteries be just the way they are.....why are we tryin to master the world.....slowly furnishing our own cenotaphs?? isn't it more fascinating just as it is...?
soon the doodhwallah will arrive....disturbing my blissful slumber with the sound of milk(40%milk and 50%water and 10%chemicals) splashing on the vessel...
very soon it will be time to go the the place which teens call "oh-hmmm-school" nd older ppl refer to as "AHH...YESSS...SCHOOL..."....
hundreds of kids from various nooks nd crannies of kolkata packed in a building for 6 hours...
bonds of friendship....games....gossips....news....canteen......nd yes ,studies. school.
although i dint exactly know wat to wite....my fingers seem to have acquired a life of their own and just dancing away to glory (as if to meet their long lost lover)..
i know not wat i am blabbering about;but tis enough that i am their and can feel the air going into my lungs as i breathe, and then following the same journey out ....but lacking one of its components(oxygen) which has somehow decided to stay back and help out my cells to burn mass in exchange of energy...E=mc2......i shall remember Mr. Newton>>>
they sound of the fan rotating( as if crying out for freedom) never seemed so prominent..
vague thoughts just enter my brain and leave before registering my memory...
very soon the birds will begin to chirp again (who the bloody hell tells them the time??)..
and slowly as if out of eternity,the yellow ball of plasma will rise into the sky...WONDERFUL...AWESOMEE (here awesome means a phenomenon which generates 'awe',not to be confused with the manner that we use at the drop of the hat for everything...from the chicken kebeb...to JLo's ass!)
why do we have to kno all the answers .....why did we have to know that the earth is revolving around the sun and not the other way round and exactly how life is created inside the womb????
why cant we let the mysteries be just the way they are.....why are we tryin to master the world.....slowly furnishing our own cenotaphs?? isn't it more fascinating just as it is...?
soon the doodhwallah will arrive....disturbing my blissful slumber with the sound of milk(40%milk and 50%water and 10%chemicals) splashing on the vessel...
very soon it will be time to go the the place which teens call "oh-hmmm-school" nd older ppl refer to as "AHH...YESSS...SCHOOL..."....
hundreds of kids from various nooks nd crannies of kolkata packed in a building for 6 hours...
bonds of friendship....games....gossips....news....canteen......nd yes ,studies. school.
on infidelity
even as there are great debates on infidelity and multiplicity...i wonder whether its animal instinct or ust plainly man's(or woman's) folly to look for greener pastures...
two people(preferably of the opposite sexes) meet...feel a connection...start with friendship....fall in love and "commit" themselves to each other and go on to'commit ' the greatest mistake of gettin married...
first of all...this whole CONNECTION thingie is not only overrated but more often than not,MISUSED....after all it is all in the mind...people usually feel the connection with whomever they want to...maybe subconsiously(the subconsious is a gr8 device b the way...it can solve math problems for you even as you blissfully slumber...i'll get back to that sumday later)
so as i was sayin...this 'connection' excuse is just not happenin guys...we are all humans after all and are bound to have some interests in common.....ATTRACTION is a more appropriate word...
in any case..after a few year they realize that they cant stand the disgusting habits of their partners (which thay had found cho-cute in the initial stages of their relationship)
they quickly grow bored and feel more 'connected' to their secretaries/neighbour/colleague/old flame/friend's daughter/daughter's friend...etc...
they break up...
but wait a minute...what happened to thoe immortal feelings of passion that they nested for their exes,the promises ,the trifles of love??? all gone down the drain....
i usually believe that a normal person cannot stick with one partner...man was meant to have multiple partners...God wanted it so...
but at the same time..concepts like love fascinate me.....i am transported to a different world while watching those lovey-dovey movies(including the slight swelling of jol in the eyes)....but soon the reality dawns upon me...but i cannot help wishing it were all real ...just for lovesake...
hey...i aren't quite expressing myself right..but wat the heck...
jus pouring ma thoughts for later reference when even i get involved with a family,running between work,dropping my older kid to football practice and wakin up at the middle of the night to change the poo of my little sweety....
two people(preferably of the opposite sexes) meet...feel a connection...start with friendship....fall in love and "commit" themselves to each other and go on to'commit ' the greatest mistake of gettin married...
first of all...this whole CONNECTION thingie is not only overrated but more often than not,MISUSED....after all it is all in the mind...people usually feel the connection with whomever they want to...maybe subconsiously(the subconsious is a gr8 device b the way...it can solve math problems for you even as you blissfully slumber...i'll get back to that sumday later)
so as i was sayin...this 'connection' excuse is just not happenin guys...we are all humans after all and are bound to have some interests in common.....ATTRACTION is a more appropriate word...
in any case..after a few year they realize that they cant stand the disgusting habits of their partners (which thay had found cho-cute in the initial stages of their relationship)
they quickly grow bored and feel more 'connected' to their secretaries/neighbour/colleague/old flame/friend's daughter/daughter's friend...etc...
they break up...
but wait a minute...what happened to thoe immortal feelings of passion that they nested for their exes,the promises ,the trifles of love??? all gone down the drain....
i usually believe that a normal person cannot stick with one partner...man was meant to have multiple partners...God wanted it so...
but at the same time..concepts like love fascinate me.....i am transported to a different world while watching those lovey-dovey movies(including the slight swelling of jol in the eyes)....but soon the reality dawns upon me...but i cannot help wishing it were all real ...just for lovesake...
hey...i aren't quite expressing myself right..but wat the heck...
jus pouring ma thoughts for later reference when even i get involved with a family,running between work,dropping my older kid to football practice and wakin up at the middle of the night to change the poo of my little sweety....
castles in the air
i fall into that category of humans who cannot suppress the natural urges that are born out of excitement...
i get all charged up for small things...things which uasually end being up not-so-exciting ultimately...but the joy of thinking about somethin usually gives me more pleasure than it actually happening...funny...
i know it happens with most people...for example,planning a movie with friends or a trip/vacation is fun......but things dont exactly work out the way you had thought...do they????
...u knew it even then somewhere in the depths of your mind(obscure places where we rarely bother to venture)....but if the thinking gave you pleasure ,believe me it was worth it....
after all..it is a mind game
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